Avoidance is a Noun, Not a Verb

To think too long about doing a thing often becomes its undoing.

-Eva Young

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I’m not purposefully lazy.  I don’t consider myself to be lazy at all.  I might be disinclined to be purposefully useful though.  (I never met a thesaurus I didn’t like).  I do, however, have a tendency to over-think, over-stress, over-eat, and under-do.  I love to write.  I love to share.  I love to read your responses.  I love knowing that someone I didn’t know until they responded to me, understands and appreciates my thoughts, my wishes, my intentions, my nonsense and my innate weirdness.  My favorite is the moment finding that long-lost best friend I’ve never met until just now.  I love literally wearing my heart and mind on my sleeve, putting out my most personal thoughts into the void that is the internet.  And I love that despite having conflicting opinions, and random haters, I have found some magical people.

But back to lazy.  I over-thought, over-procrastinated and over-ate some more.  I admit I flaked but that is finished.  I can’t do that anymore because I really don’t want to be lazy and I miss writing.  I miss the weird, over sharing anonymity that this medium allows.  So help me out here dear internet stranger/friend.  Read me, read my soul.   Be my friend, my confidant, my family, my critic, my devil’s advocate, my editor, my heckler, my comfort.

Welcome back to my over-cluttered mind and under-filtered thoughts.  I’m not big on New Year’s resolutions but in effort to make a…well an effort…. I am going to make one.  I am going to write.  I am no longer going to allow myself the luxury of avoiding this.  I will not fall into the same trap of “I don’t have anything to say”, “I’m tired” or “I’ll do it tomorrow”.   Mostly because we see how well I did it tomorrow because I didn’t.  So I am doing it today because you do care and you do miss me and I have something worth saying.  I am someone worth listening to.  Not because I struggle with fertility or because my pancre-ass is broken or even because I have a nice way of grouping words but because I can funny and real and my life is always something run amok – just like yours.

So, I have some wonderful ideas here to freshen up the monotony of my blah-blah-blah.  I’m going to start occasionally writing about the pop culture I love to break up the woe-is-me-schtick of infertility and pancre-ass.  I would love to have my stranger/friends join me in these discussions, maybe even start a half-ass book club of sorts.  Soon we start Philanthropy Run Amok, so keep an eye out for that.  And I’ll be restarting my “Just Another Manic Monday”.

I have lots to tell y’all about my life, pancre-ass, and infertility.   Don’t go away my old stranger/friends and welcome my new stranger/friends, we have some work to do.